funny story on How Ramesh Accidentally Became the Village Astrologer, Matchmaker, and Ghostbuster on the Same Day


How Ramesh Accidentally Became the Village Astrologer, Matchmaker, and Ghostbuster on the Same Day


The Dosa That Changed Ramesh’s Fate

In the sleepy village of Chapparguddi, Ramesh was known for exactly two things: his love for crispy dosas and his unmatched ability to nap anywhere, including while riding his cycle. One fateful morning, he set out to the market, balancing on his head a tiffin carrier large enough to feed a cricket team.

At the dosa stall, while arguing with the vendor over whether chutney should be free (it always was), Ramesh tripped on a banana peel, landed face-first into a holy cow, and accidentally smeared vibhuti all over his forehead.

A nearby aunty saw him, gasped, and whispered, “He has the mark of a divine astrologer!”

And just like that, his fate was sealed faster than a pressure cooker whistle.



The Wedding That Nearly Became a Wrestling Match

Word spread faster than Ramu's buffalo during mating season. Soon, villagers started lining up for Ramesh’s “predictions,” which were actually just his sleep-deprived daydreams. One man asked when he would get married, and Ramesh, still half-asleep, muttered, “After the rooster crosses the road.”

The next week, a rooster ran across the road during a wedding, and the bride’s uncle screamed, “Rameshji predicted this! It’s a sign!”

Ramesh was pulled into the mandap and made the chief matchmaker. Unfortunately, he got two horoscopes mixed up and almost married a retired wrestler to a timid Sanskrit teacher. They only stopped fighting when Ramesh promised them a joint honeymoon to Ooty—paid for by his cousin Babu, who was still hiding under the sofa.


The Haunted Mango Tree and the Possessed Parrot

By evening, a new drama unfolded. The village priest claimed that the ancient mango tree near the temple was haunted—mainly because it dropped mangoes only on bald heads.

Coincidentally, Ramesh had a bald patch and had just been hit thrice.

Everyone turned to him.

Under immense pressure (and a lot of mangoes), Ramesh waved his hands, shouted “BOO!” and made loud farting noises. Miraculously, a parrot flew out of the tree squawking “Main bhoot hoon!”—it had been trained by a mischievous kid with a Bluetooth speaker.

The villagers screamed. Ramesh screamed. The parrot screamed.

But Ramesh was declared a ghostbuster.

That night, he was gifted a garland of onions, 4.5 kilos of jaggery, and an honorary tea-stall stool.

Moral of the Story: Never underestimate the power of dosas, banana peels, and parrots with Wi-Fi access.

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